Home Alone lessons

Movie marathons on television are yet another sign of Christmas, and a welcome one at that.  There are few times I enjoy more than hunkering down with my family at the fort with a fire in the stove and an assortment of films a remote click away.

Some of these films have (not so) excellent lessons attached to their nostalgic glow.  No exception to this, Home Alone (which, like the Mummy movies, had the misfortune of some obnoxious film to come along and steal the slot for its third installment) just happens to be a leader in teaching said lessons via timeless entertainment.

Disclaimer: I will always treasure the first two Home Alone films for their place in my childhood and in Christmas movie marathons.

5. A film's entertainment can consist entirely of gratuitous violence and still be successful.

It's nothing new for a film to be as stuffed with violence as a cannoli with cream.  Yet when you think about it both of the Home Alone films literally depend on just how many potentially lethal (or at least highly dangerous) things an eight year old can mastermind and implement on a pair of knuckle dragging idiots.  Let's see, there's the assorted critical blows to the head and upper torso regions by household objects such as paint cans and a freaking IRON, a blow torch I repeat a BLOW TORCH to the head, and oh geez HOW many times did the Wet Bandits slip, get pushed, fall, etc. down stairs, through TWO FLOORS, off a building, etc. etc.? (They don't want to talk about it).

Yet the film was by most standards a success.  The first Home Alone film had only the THIRD highest gross in 1990...  No big deal.

4.  It's okay to fabricate an exorbitant amount of actually lethal attacks on a pair of stupid burglars to protect a houseful of insured possessions.

Or in the case of the second film, to distract a pair of really dumb crooks (so dumb I don't get how they escaped from prison in the first place) from, er, well that's not really clear; perhaps just to mess with them until it was time to call the cops (which was really when Kevin first got lost, but oh well).

The stuff in your house is more valuable than your life.  This is what Home Alone teaches us.   When a pair of violent (albeit stupid but still violent) crooks descend upon your house it is wise to turn into a kid version of Rambo and defend it yourself.

3.  Criminals can be complete morons.

While this isn't exactly the revelation of the century, Home Alone teaches us that some criminals are REALLY stupid.   I mean, naming yourselves "The Wet Bandits" and effectively connecting yourself to EVERY robbery you've committed with your hallmark (at least the jury won't get hung up on lack of evidence), touching a STEAMING, GLOWING-RED door knob and wondering why your hand practically burns off, and continuing a robbery with the knowledge that the house is OCCUPIED (even if it's just a kid), stupid.

I've heard of some dumb crooks.  E.g. the idiot who broke into a car, stole a bunch of stuff, and left behind the camera because it apparently wasn't worth anything but not before taking a picture of himself.   With the camera. Pretty dumb.

Now these guys in Home Alone, they take the cheesecake to go because their stupidity matched the camera incident and pretty much multiplied itself over.  I mean, come on, a freaking eight year old outsmarted them.  In two movies.   Granted said eight year old also managed to get away with a crap ton of property and financial damage without any apparent impunity (save for the token, KEVIN?!!! line at the end).

But seriously, if all criminals were that dumb I'm willing to say the world would be a better place.

2.  Parents can be complete morons.

Possibly worse than the dumb criminals are that some parents are total idiots.  Another truism and another instance that Home Alone really steps up its A-game.

The parents lose their freaking kid not once but TWICE in as many movies.   Okay, the first one they left him behind on a family trip to France.

Wait.

No it's okay, the film shows how the pesky neighborhood boy who was conveniently wearing a hat and had his back turned during the family roll call the morning of the departure was the reason why no one noticed little Kevin was missing until a good couple HOURS into the dang flight.   Honey, I keep thinking we forgot something.  No, not the coffee maker. No, not the garage door.  Oh, I remember, OUR EIGHT YEAR OLD!

And as if the family didn't learn their lesson the first time around, they decide the next year it's a good idea to go to New York City.  And subsequently lose their kid. Again.

Parents of the year material there.

The sad thing is, there are some legitimately awful parents out there.   At least Kevin's parents really do love him, even if they always losing track of him and have no idea about the mortal danger he's been through.

And finally...

1.  It's NOT okay under almost any circumstance to find a freaking gold tooth lying around in your house.

Especially when you've been out of town and have no real way of knowing exactly who has (and hasn't) been in your home.

(I added the "almost any" in there for the sake of logic.)

Come on, I realize you guys are incredibly wealthy but even your mini-mansion can't possibly materialize gold from its rare Peruvian rain forest wood floors.  This kind of goes back to the parenting issue, in this case how parents can be so freaking thick as to not be able to tell that essentially a full on WAR occurred in their house in a matter of a few days.

Honey, what's this? It looks like a gold tooth. Huh.

Based on their track record the McCallister family is doomed, which may possibly explain why the third installment was hijacked...

The lineup:

• Don't try this at home applies to what happens in those gratuitous violence movies I spoke of earlier.  
• Just call the police.
• Instill in your children to call the police (or at least a neighbor or relative) if you neglect their presence on a family trip out of the country, leaving them home alone.
• Also teach your children to not talk to strange old men when no one else is around.
• Call the police when you observe potentially dangerous (even if dumb) crooks canvassing your neighborhood... ESPECIALLY when said crooks are peeping in your windows...  when your house is freaking under siege... CALL THE POLICE. 

The stereotypical "donut munching, head scratching cop" portrayed in many films including these aside, the police are actually TRAINED to kick bad guys' butts and keep you safe. Yes yes, who doesn't get a laugh when Marv falls down the stairs... at least twice...? But seriously, if there are criminals bent on violence in your home's vicinity, call the freaking police. Like I said, it's their job.

Now excuse me, I have a movie to watch.  Cheers!

Signed,

RF

Two Goodbyes

For one of the last writing exercises from my writing class this past semester, I elaborated on a prompt given in class.  Originally, we listed five goodbyes and then detailed one of them.  I went into detail two more...

Goodbye No. 1 Spring Break

Airplanes roared overhead, car breaks squealed, suitcases hit the pavement with cluncks and ca-clacks, people shouted over the din.   I hopped out of the red Grand Caravan and hauled my hopefully (fingers crossed) less than fifty pound suitcase with me.   My Uncle got out with me and gave me a farewell hug.  The usual, these weeks go by too fast, we’ll see you soon, love you.  I shouted a goodbye to Grandpa through the open slider door and he waved from the driver’s seat.

I had no sooner turned to face the sliding doors and the imminent ticketing counter when I decided that goodbye simply would not suffice.  I made the split second decision to abandon my suitcase (sorry airport security voice) and dash around the van to give my Grandpa a proper goodbye.   His hearty laugh, one that always came from deep in his belly and could fill a whole room, and no less overpower the sounds around us came through the glass before he opened the door.

“I love you Grandpa, see you this summer,” I promised as I hugged him.   I breathed in his familiar smokey scent. 
“Love you too, kiddo.”   His merry eyes were full of laughter.
That was the last hug I gave him.

Goodbye No. 2 Wednesday 30 June 2010

“Hey Grandpa, Happy Birthday!” I spoke into the phone.  His laughter filled the receiver.
“I can’t wait to see you this weekend!” I told him.
“I’m looking forward to it. So what’s the plan?”
“Mom wants to leave early on Saturday, so we should be in by eight.”
“Well I’ll see you on Sunday morning then,” he chuckled back.  This was one of our jokes.   He always went to bed around seven at night, so whenever we drove up to New York for a visit and got in past seven, we wouldn’t see him until the morning.

“Guess what?”  I told him next, “I want to get a motorcycle!”   There was that belly deep laugh again.  “Oh really?  A crotch rocket?  Why do you want one of those?”
“Because they’re awesome and bad ass,” I promptly replied.
“I suppose you’d be the first in the family to have one,” he laughed.

“On another note, Mom and I were talking the other day and it looks like I should start getting things in line for my commission next semester.”
“Oh so you decided then?”
“Yup, the plan is as soon as I graduate in ’12, I’ll be heading off to OCS in Rhode Island.   I’ll be a Navy Officer, Grandpa.”
I could just see his smile as he replied, “That’s really something.  I’m really proud of you, kiddo.”
“Thank you Grandpa, I’m proud of you too.”  I replied back, “I guess I’ll let you go then, it’s getting close to bed time, huh?”
“Absolutely,” he replied, “I’ll see you on Sunday then.”
“Alright, see you Sunday. Love you, bye.”
“Love you too, kiddo.”

Three days later, my Mom, brother and I were en route to NY when we got a call that my Grandpa had died in his sleep early that morning.   He had just turned seventy-six.

XXX

Goodbye Grandpa, I love and miss you terribly.

Love,

RF

The Jesse Tree Celebration

Our very own Jesse Tree!

One of the most exciting things for me this past month has been my family group's celebration of the Jesse Tree.  Now, before I get any credit whatsoever in sounding cultured I must confess that my first thought upon being told we were going to have one this year was "What on earth is that?" followed closely by "Jesse... Jesse... I know he was one of those Old Testament guys... Yeah, that's all I've got."  So I promptly awayed to a computer and (of course) consulted Google.  Oh Google.  I did come to learn by experience though as well, I am happy to say. 

The Jesse Tree is a celebration of advent.  It is, in a way, a more "Christian" version of the Christmas tree than the common one (which I have no beef with).  The Jesse Tree celebration is not intended to be in lieu of the more common Christmas traditions.  It's a way of celebrating the coming of the Christ child into the world by following the Old Testament events that led up to His arrival some two thousand years ago.  An additional bonus for me was I got to brush up on some of my OT.  Woot woot!  Now some people celebrate the Jesse Tree every day of advent with an OT event, but because our group meets weekly we condensed our celebration into weekly readings of the events.  Both are common practices.

The bible is chalk full of references to trees.  They symbolize life, rebirth, etc.  In Isaiah 11, the Prophet records "A shoot will spring forth from the stump of Jesse, and a branch out of his roots."  This passage is one of the prophecies made of the coming of Christ, a branch from the root of Jesse (Jesus was a descendant of Jesse).  Thus the Jesse Tree is so named.

For each OT event celebrated by the Jesse Tree, there is an assigned ornament.  Traditionally, children make these.  This is one of the ways the JTC involves the whole family.  The kiddos get a chance to put that creativity to good use!  Boy did we have some beauties this year, I wish I had pictures.  I did contribute and make a couple ornaments, because I'm a dork and I have yet to grow up.  Props still to the kids though, they're little Van Goghs and Picassos in the making (sans the ear issue).

There are twenty-eight events and/or themes in the Jesse Tree.

1. Creation; symbolized by a dove ornament
2. The first sin; symbolized by an apple
3. The flood;  symbolized by a rainbow or an ark
4. God's promise to Abraham to make his descendants "as numerous as the stars;"  symbolized by a field of stars
5. The offering of Isaac where Abraham trusted God and God provided a ram in place of Isaac to be sacrificed; symbolized by a ram
6. Jacob dreams of a ladder to heaven and God promises to continue the promise through Jacob's line that he made to Jacob's father Abraham; symbolized by, well, a ladder
7. God's providence in Joseph's life, even though he was mistreated by his brothers and sold into slavery he was in Egypt when a famine struck and was able to provide food for his family; symbolized by Joseph's coat of many colors
8. God's leadership through Moses to deliver his people from the Egyptians; symbolized by a burning bush (this one didn't have to burn without burning up the bush, in fact it didn't have to burn at all because that would be a fire hazard...)
9. The Passover, where God instructed the Israelites to spread lamb's blood on their doors one night to protect them from the death of the firstborn plague.  Also the Exodus out of Egypt; this is symbolized by a lamb (baaa).
10. The Torah at Sinai, where God gives Moses the tablets of the Torah; symbolized by (le gasp!) the tablets of the Torah!
11. The fall of Jericho which allowed the Israelites to finally enter the promised land; symbolized by a ram's horn trumpet.
12. God used Gideon, an obscure guy from the tribe of Manasseh, to free Israel; symbolized by a crown.
13. David, a shepherd for the people; symbolized by a shepherd's crook
14. Elijah and the prophets of Baal.  Baal's prophets could not convince Baal to burn the offering to prove his power, but even after Elijah ordered a stone altar to be built and the sacrifice to be drenched in water, Yahweh (God) burned the whole dang thing; symbolized by... a stone altar!
15. God's faithfulness and deliverance to Hezekiah; symbolized by an empty tent.
16. Isaiah's call to holiness, where he has a dream in which a coal of living fire is touched to his lips; symbolized by fire tongs with "hot" coal (once again fire hazards prevented the real deal, as it did with Elijah's altar.)
17. The Exile of the Israelites from the promised land; symbolized by tears ;(
18. The Israelites waiting to return; symbolized by a stone watchtower
19. The return and rebuilding in the promised land; a city wall is the symbol
20. John the Baptist prepares the way for the Christ by calling Israel to repent of their sins; symbolized by a white shell
21. Mary's visit by Gabriel, who tells her she will be the mother of the Christ; symbolized by a white lily
22. The joy in Elizabeth, Mary Jesus' mother's cousin, who became pregnant after being barren until she was considered too old to have children.  Chronologically, this happened before John the Baptist prepared the way because, well, Elizabeth was pregnant with him.  Jesus still cooking too. The point is the joy; this is symbolized by a mother and child.
23. Zechariah doubted when Gabriel told him his wife, Elizabeth, was going to have a child.  He was struck mute until the birth and naming of John the Baptist (though they didn't name him the Baptist at that time...).  He named his son via writing; symbolized by a pencil and tablet.
24. Joseph was in strange predicament when the girl he was essentially engaged (okay, pledged) to turned up pregnant and there was no way he was involved.  Gabriel visited him also and told him it was all good and Joe trusted him; this symbol was a carpenter's hammer.
25. The three Magi learned of the Christ child who was to be born and set out to worship him; this is symbolized by a star.
26. The birth of Jesus the Messiah; symbolized by a manger.
27. Christ the son of God; symbolized by the Chi-Rho (XP) symbol

Okay I lied, there were twenty-seven.  At any rate, I really enjoyed this celebration.  I intend to incorporate it into my own kiddo's Christmases some day.  It's a great addition to the Christmas season.

Cheers!

RF

Still in love

The countdown to Christmas is in the home stretch.  The season of joy and peace is here.  I love the Christmas radio station, the lights everywhere, and the piles of snow we've managed to retain.  I love the spirit of my childhood that delights in the traditions.  There's a reason that it's called "the most wonderful time of the year," (at the risk of being cliche).  It really is, for some.

Christmas is a time of joy, but for some it's a time of sadness too.  There are people who will be spending the holiday alone, some for the first time and some for the umpteenth time.  There are people who will be missing.  There are people for whom the holidays are only a reminder of just how hard the times have been.  

While I don't pretend to be alone or destitute, just one of the St. Louis Post Dispatch's 100 Neediest Cases is testament to that, I still have my baggage to add to the not so cheery side of the season as well.  It's been a little over five months since my angel Grandpa E's birthday weekend, since he went to sleep in his reclining chair and woke up in heaven.  Some days it feels as if it's been an eternity since I last heard his wonderful laughter, other days it feels like I just heard the news all over again.  Some days I miss him so much it hurts.  It's taken me about a week now to really begin to comprehend that we're about to face a Christmas without him.  It got worse when I went down my Christmas list and realized that I wouldn't be shopping for his present.  In a very real sense, we're all still in mourning.  The wounds are still fresh, not that I expect to ever miss him less.  

At the same time, I'm positively surrounded by love.  In a way, the trio of my mom, brother, and me have been adopted into a "family."  Last month I featured our family group in my Give Thanks series.  In short, they're a group of families from my church who we join for a weekly night of fellowship (and lots of food).  I love them dearly.  Their support over the past year has been truly a God send.  Just the other night we had our Christmas kick off sort of night, with the last of our Jesse Tree celebration and a good old game of white elephant.  At the end of every family group night, we have a group prayer which we all contribute our concerns and thanksgivings.  On this particular night there was a fairly resounding prayer of thanks for the group and how we've really become like a large (albeit slightly eccentric but nonetheless loving) family.  This really touched me, as I looked around the room at all those dear faces.  At heart I'm a family person; I come from a relatively small family and obviously my immediate family is rather fractured.  This is why I felt so touched by my family group the other night;  they've opened their hearts to the three of us and given us that love I've always wanted in a big family. 
Now before the family I'm related to gets overlooked, I cannot say I'm not loved by them.  They may be small, but they're special.  While my parents are divorced, I know they still love my brother and I.

This harsh contrast between the utter hurt of missing my dear Grandpa and the joy from the rest of my loving family is hard to take in.  In the end, it's love that binds both of these.  It's love that fills my family and it's love that makes me miss my Grandpa so much.  While it hurts, I wouldn't trade loving him for a heart that doesn't ache.  After all, in the end, I'm still in love.

Merry Christmas to all, to those who rejoice and to those who mourn.  May all find the light of love somewhere in their lives.

Signed,

RF

My dear Grandpa E, Christmas 2009

Modern Slavery

Today CNN reported on a human trafficking ring that was recently thwarted in the Newark area.  Human trafficking, i.e. slavery.  Right here in the United States.  In 2010.



For the full CNN report, refer to "Held as slaves, now free" from CNN's website 

This is kind of a hot button issue for me.  Human trafficking awareness is something I am very passionate about.  I began researching about a year or so ago on the subject, after hearing about it essentially for the first time (or at least, becoming more aware of it) in a violent sex crimes class.  I'm a Criminal Justice major with a hope of doing something in the realm of working against trafficking in women and children.

The following is the introductory paragraph from a final paper for one of my CJ classes this past semester:

If someone asked me what I would buy with fifty dollars, I would think of a dinner for three at Applebee’s, a jacket from Target, or a tank and a half of gas for my truck.  I would never think that for fifty dollars, I could buy a human being.  Every day, in nearly every country across the globe, from China to our own backyard, human beings are bought and sold in a vast system where they are exploited by slave traders and holders.  This global phenomena is known as Human Trafficking.  In the United States alone, more than 100,000 people are enslaved at any given time while an additional 17,500 new victims are trafficked across our borders each year (David Batstone, Not for Sale).  While statistics do inference “at risk” populations, the viral industry that is Human Trafficking typically does not discriminate by race, nationality, or gender.  Any human being can be trafficked.  

I have compiled a survey of some of the research I have done on this subject:

• Globally, 80% of trafficking victims are female.  50% are children. (Hidden Slaves)
•  Johns pay to have sex with enslaved girls as young as five years old.  They often view their payment as earning the right to take a child's liberty. (The Client)
• Traffickers will groom their victims to earn their trust; they eventually convince their victims to travel with them, most often to a foreign country, often under the guise of a well paying job or an education
• Once victims reach their destination, they are stripped of their identifying documents (passports, driver's licenses, etc.) and often brutalized.  Traffickers will often use rape, especially if their victims are virgins, as a control device.  In many cultures, an unmarried woman who has sex regardless of the circumstance is considered despoiled and a shame on her family.  Traffickers know this well and brutally use it to shame victims into staying with them
• Traffickers essentially create a situation where their victims are utterly dependent on them.  A victim may find herself in a foreign country where she doesn't speak the language, where she is told that if she goes to the police they will put her in jail for illegal immigration (which in some cases is sadly true), where she has no personal identification documents.  She is completely at the mercy of her captors.  
• It is from there that traffickers exploit the women and children who are their victims, selling them for domestic and/or sexual slavery to the highest bidder or pimping them out, allowing them to be raped over and over again, daily. 
• Trafficking is not just a problem in Asia, Europe, or Africa.  It thrives in the U.S. as well.  

While I am hopeful that CNN's coverage of this particular case of the women from West Africa will gain  more attention to the problem of trafficking in the U.S., I know that for cases like this one that make the News there can be hundreds more that go unnoticed.  There are people in our own country who are enslaved, many of them pass under the public eye without a hitch.

Here are some sources I highly suggest for more information:

• Not for Sale, by David Batstone
• Trade, 2007 film
• The Client, pdf 
• Hidden Slaves, Forced Labor in the U.S., pdf

Signed,

RF

Operation Beautiful

"I'm Caitlin, and I'm the editor of Operation Beautiful. The mission of Operation Beautiful is to post anonymous notes in public places for other women to find. The point is that WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL. You are enough... just the way you are!"

When I first watched this during a presentation for a psychology project, I literally teared up.  There is something truly beautiful about this.  We are beautiful, every one of us, just the way we are.  I am passing this on to encourage other women to at the very least stop and tell yourself, "I am beautiful."  Because, babe, you are.

I have plans for some sticky note action in the near future

Warm fuzzies,

RF